come fly with me

my horoscope yesterday

Fri Dec 2: Telepathic.Trust your natural telepathic abilities today and listen to your gut feelings if all else fails. Romantic relationships may stumble as misunderstandings abound, but this can be avoided by listening with your heart.

what had happened: i saw the womyn of my dreams last night. this isn’t new, of course, because i fucking love womyn and there’s something real special about a confident womyn of color that makes me stumble all over myself. she was so gorgeous, and so were her shoes! she was so poised and graceful (and basically the opposite of my slouchy bummy awkward ass). i paused my not-terribly-surreptitious staring to actually look at some of the art on the walls, turn back and bam! she was gone! ouch! not that i’d had a chance anyway~

but then i see her again at the bar we’re going to watch the burlesque show at. my second chance! …to stare like a creeper and look away when caught, apparently.

later, as i passed her on the way to the bathroom, she stops me with a hand on my arm and suddenly those sharp eyes are on me. i’m speechless, of course. she asks if i am cody(?), who i gather is a model i resemble somehow(?). i shake my head and maybe manage to say no. she says, oh, you’re very beautiful.

what i should have done: smiled, told that womyn i wasn’t who she thought i was (but that i’d like to know her anyway), and fucking introduced myself

what i did instead: …thanked her. goddess help me, i thanked her and scampered the fuck away as quickly as the crowd would allow. katie demanded that i go back and say something, because duh, wtf that is obviously a line. and even if it wasn’t! a gorgeous womyn touched me(!) told me i looked like a model(!) and that i’m very beautiful(!) and i ran the fuck away.

i somehow always believed that by the time i hit this age, i would know what the fuck i was doing when it came to womyn. failllllllllll

reblogged because this is my life. my awkward life.